The Frustration Statement: A Writing Template to Evolve Ideas from Rough to Resonant

Greetings, fair reader of the internet kingdom.

Last time I wrote to you, I shared what's become the foundational concept driving everything you and I explore together, everywhere you find me across said internet kingdom: in my newsletter, on my podcast, and in my public speaking and various related projects: resonance.

What does it take to resonate? Why would others pick you, stick with you, and stick up for you? And how do we both learn to resonate and then use what we learn to build our businesses and leave our legacies?

So many questions, so little time. We haven't another second to waste.

(Hold on, I hear my toddler knocking something over in the other room.)

(Wait a sec, my infant son just spit up on me while I was attending to the toddler.)

(Welp, the dog got my sandwich off the table.)

(The toddler has apparently hidden my plate somewhere in my house.)

(Update: Turns out I actually forgot to use a plate at all. I just made a sandwich on the counter and carried it around the house in my hand like a caveman with a kill. Who has time for plates when juggling two kids under age three, a pandemic, and a business? I mean honestly...)

Where was I? Ah, yes: So many questions, literally no time.

If perchance you missed the last thing I wrote about resonance, go back and read it here. It was a kind of pillar piece of this whole "resonance" exploration.

Oh, and of course, there was THIS...

(If you know, you know.)

(But seriously, the rest of my writing will make more sense if you know, so please go back one step if you didn't already. It's created the most DMs of anything I've written all year. I promise you won't regret it.)

Last time, we established that the goal of our work is to resonate with others. Of course it is. But we never really stop to consider how resonance actually works -- or how we can get better at resonating.

The need to resonate applies whether we want to win new business or subscribers, retain and delight existing customers or employees, or make things that make a difference in any form or fashion (or all of the above).

To achieve more, resonate deeper.

And the pinnacle of resonance is to become someone's favorite.

When you create someone's favorite thing, you're not necessarily the biggest or top-ranked or most visible. You're also not necessarily considered "great" in any objective sense. No, it's far more subjective and emotional. When you're their favorite, you become their personal, preferred pick for a specific purpose. They pick you, stick with you, and stick up for you -- regardless of other options, ideas, or noise in their world.

• Not just followers. Superfans.

• Not just customers. Evangelists.

• Not just coworkers. Teammates.

• Not just new hires. Difference-makers.

You get the idea.

I believe resonance supersedes everything else we want to do, and I also believe the ability to resonate is a learnable craft.

This is how I visualize the craft:

I call that the Flywheel of Favoritism. "Flywheel" because I write about business and apparently everyone in business needs to design their very own flywheel. (I'll let you go down that rabbit hole on your own time.) "Favoritism" because, sure, that's definitely the endgame ... but also because if I don't use alliteration in naming things, I don't get a return on my English degree.

Anyway, last time, I explained why I like flywheels, and I (briefly) defined each of the four quadrants. Once more, here is your last chance to catch up before proceeding...

Today, I wanted to begin exploring that first part a bit more deeply...

The Idea: Say Something That Matters

In any profession, we need to clearly and concisely articulate our ideas in order to resonate with others. It's not enough to THINK a great idea. We have to COMMUNICATE it in a way that resonates. In other words, the challenge in turning ideas into resonant work is to say it in a way that matters to others. Deeply.

The best ideas feel instantly irresistible, but when that's the case, you can bet there was a much longer period of developing the idea before it could be delivered in a way that hits home that deeply, that quickly. In other words, we can proactively develop our ideas.

For example, we can share bits and pieces of our thinking with others in conversation and, of course, in the content we create. This helps sharpen our thinking and helps us find the words that make our ideas just sorta ... click ... when others receive them. My rally cry to you: Don't "come up" with great ideas. Come OUT with them. Stop sitting on what you're stewing on and start SAYING IT. Everywhere. To everyone.

Your ability to say something that matters will improve exponentially.

The culmination of this refinement and improvement process is the most pithy, powerful way to articulate an idea: the premise.

• Think of a podcast whose name and brief description excites you enough to both sample the show AND refer it to a friend, even before you've listened at all.

• Think of the copy on a brand's home page or jobs page that makes you think, "Wow, I gotta go with them."

• Think of the keynote speaker who stands on stage and delivers that one powerful line that hits you like lightning to the chest. "Of course! It's so obvious!"

To that I'd say, yes, it seems obvious to you NOW. But when that idea first entered their mind, it was far from obvious, because it was far from developed. It wasn't yet a pithy, powerful premise.

* * *

A premise is different than an idea. In fact, they book-end the process.

An idea is where you start the planning process. A premise is where you end it.

We like to say we "hatch" an idea. I disagree. I think we crap out ideas like a bird craps out eggs. (Again, I studied English, so my biology may be a bit lacking here.) Then, if we incubate an idea-egg for the right amount of time, we hatch a premise. The premise has legs. The premise can stand up on its own and go do stuff out in the world. The egg couldn't do that. The egg simply contained all the goop and guts necessary to give way to a premise.

And none of that could happen without the incubation period -- without proactively developing it.

So what does our development phase look like? (Yanno, since we don't literally crap out ideas as oblong containers and then sit on them as we scroll Twitter.)

Well, in addition to discussing your ideas with others, whether privately or publicly, we can use some writing frameworks to help hatch a premise from an idea. There's no ONE right way, of course, but I like to use two writing frameworks in particular: the Frustration Statement and the Empathy Statement.

The Frustration Statement helps you build towards your Empathy Statement, which then serves as the most potent bit of copy and inspiration to inform your communication. The Frustration Statement helps you refine the most crucial part of the story you're telling, while the Empathy Statement then turns a crucial story element into an entire story -- one that resonates with others. That final piece, the Empathy Statement, is like the feathers and claws and beak for your now-hatched premise. It's what allows your premise to start flapping and walking and pecking its way around the world.

This week, I'll share the template for the Frustration Statement. Next week, we'll focus on the Empathy Statement.

Frustration Statement Template

If you want others to rally around your ideas, you first need to give them something to rally around ... which means you, as the communicator, need to tell a better story. People make sense of the world through stories -- sometimes, literal narratives, but often simply the things they tell themselves in their heads, which you might call their perspective or their personal narrative. Tapping into someone's existing narrative -- or giving them a different one -- is how we inspire action.

So, to say something that matters, we need to tell a better story, and central to any story is tension. Masterful storytellers are really masters of tension.

It’s fine to say, for example, “I’m frustrated more marketers don’t produce video, so we built an app to help.” But you can tell a better story. To do so, revisit the frustration. That's not really WHY you’re frustrated, if you're being honest. (Really? You're frustrated more marketers don't create video? THAT upsets you? Dig deeper. Why does that upset you?)

"I'm frustrated more marketers don't produce video ... because video is powerful ... because video humanizes the communicator. Oh! I'm frustrated more marketing doesn't feel human."

Now you're onto something. You're getting closer to a premise. You're closer to saying something that matters. You're here to make marketing more human.

Your idea-egg is getting warmer.

Here's the template to write your Frustration Statement:

The purpose is not to write beautifully or even cleanly. The purpose is to write messy thoughts, then revisit and refine them as you start to talk about your frustrations with others. Don't overthink this. If anything, you shouldn't think your way through this so much as feel your way forward.

THE PROBLEM:

• What are you most frustrated by in your niche or around your community?

• Not frustrated? Then what are you most curious about, or what have you noticed needs to improve the most? (Your idea is about pushing for something better in your community.)

• Why? What’s the problem with the status quo now?

Example
(Assume my idea is to make a podcast about creativity in business.)

• For too many people in business, “creativity” means “big.” For too many people, this means they never pursue their creative aspirations.

WHY THE PROBLEM EXISTS:

• What causes it?

• Why does the stuff you dislike happen or exist?

• What stands in the way of anything better?

Example

• Today, we so easily see the huge successes of others, the big followings, the final projects, the stories about our heroes, and we disassociate ourselves from the works we admire.

THE BETTER WAY:

• What's your vision for something better? (Not your company or solution or project -- the philosophy or approach which then leads people TO that stuff.)

• What change do people need to make?

• What's your vision for the future? What are you building towards?

Example:

• We imagine a world where more creative people pursue their passion projects and turn passion into income, because they see creativity for what it really is: the sum total of lots of little, hidden choices, which any of us can make. It’s NOT “big” at all. It's not for a privileged few.

THE TRIBE:

• Who is this for? What types of people might agree with this?

• What do you all have in common? Focus on psychographics, not just demographics -- beliefs and other things you can't see just looking at others. Again, make it personal and emotional.

• (Conversely, can you think of the people who would disagree with all of this? What do they have in common or believe that differs from you?)

Example:

• This podcast [remember, in my example, that's the idea] will serve people who create across mediums but share one main thing in common: they’re craft-driven creators in business. They adore creating things and want to bridge the gap between side projects and a livelihood. They use words like “art” in private, but are tired or frustrated from justifying their creative impulses in the workplace. They’re ready to unleash.

* * *

We all want to create more resonant work, but our usual approach to communicating our ideas falls short. We crap out the idea-egg and think, "Welp, that's it. That's the thing you get now." It hasn't been incubated. It's not developed. It's not yet a premise.

How you think about something isn't exactly how you communicate it which, in turn, isn't exactly how others need to hear it. It all requires a proactive idea development process in order for someone else to conclude that what you're saying does, indeed, matter.

In the end, great ideas are built, not found, and much of that building process means turning your rough but relevant ideas into a pithy, powerful premise.

It starts with a better story, and better stories require more compelling tension. That's what the Frustration Statement helps you come up with -- nay, come OUT with, as you consistently share your thinking with others to refine and improve how you communicate.

And speaking of "others," next week, we'll talk about how to answer the most critical question on the minds of others who encounter your work: "Why is this for me?"

Next time, we'll build on the Frustration Statement to explore the Empathy Statement. As we move from idea-eggs to fully hatched premises, I wonder:

What does it take for a premise to fly?

* * *

Join the journey: Travel the business world with me in search of stories and frameworks to help us create more resonant work. Subscribe free to my storytelling podcast, Unthinkable, or my newsletter, Playing Favorites (below).