The rule of 3 for managing managers

My friend Mikaela has a really demanding group of managers and executives around her at work. You might call them meddlesome. (She won’t, so I will.)

As a blogger, a podcaster, and a creative mind in marketing, she often feels like those leaders have no idea what her job is really for — and they definitely don’t understand how her work actually works.

Normally in life, if someone has a strong opinion or request, and we know they have no clue what the thing in question is for, nor how it actually works, we simply … ignore them.

Bosses should be no different.

(If your heart just picked up speed a bit, I’m with you. Or at least I was, until I tried this little technique in a few different jobs … and it worked.)

Remember the rule of 3 for managing managers:

If you think a boss’s idea is a waste of time or the wrong move, don’t act until they’ve asked you three times.

Busy managers have a way of routinely asking for and requesting work that unfortunately derails good work. They often do so before rushing onto the next problem or task. And here’s the thing: All that rushing around means most of what they’re asking for is forgotten as quickly as it popped to their minds.

Consider the executive who wants their company podcast to have more ratings and reviews on Apple Podcasts and asks the host to secure a few more.

What they don’t realize could fill a full 60-minute episode: the show itself isn’t worth listening to yet and so that’s a better time investment; the audience, should they hear from you directly, would probably prefer to receive value, not a request to appease your ego; Apple has de-prioritized ratings for its podcast charts; trying to rank higher in a directory of general categories means creating a more generic show, and all great shows that don’t sell ad space are better off being niche… and a lot more.

It’s a bad idea. It’s a poor use of your time. And yet… the boss asked. Do you do it? Do you say yes?

I say, not yet, and maybe not ever. Acknowledge receipt, then see if they bring it back up. If they do, buy some more time. If they bring it up a third time, you’ll know it’s really important to them, and you face a choice: say yes and do it, even if you disagree (requires you trust them fully) or make your case for something else. (A boss who refuses to listen to the people who know something they don’t is a boss worth leaving.)

Remember the rule of 3 for managing managers. You’ll be amazed at how rarely you hear about the initial idea again. The very same idea that would have blown up YOUR schedule was a passing thought to that executive. (This is a major problem among leaders: We as human beings don’t realize how our words make others feel.)

Use this rule of 3 to flush out the fleeting ideas that would distract and derail you from doing work that matters. Isn’t that why we’re here? To use the little time we have left on this earth on the things that matter most.

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